Apparently that's one way to say goodbye in Dutch. So today was my last day in Amsterdam as I leave early tomorrow morning for Berlin. I also need to make a correction to something I said in an earlier post. The girls in the windows are sectioned into specialties (like the supermarket). So when I said they were all unattractive and couldn't give it away for free in America, apparently I was in the "heavy set black/hispanic" girl section. I needed to go over to aisle 6 for the pretty white girls. My bad and I apologize whole heartedly to the working girls of Amsterdam - some of you are very pretty hookers.
Today was sort of gray and dreary, so I finished doing the museums I didn't have time for yesterday. After that I just sort of hung out at a cafe and had a coffee or two with these little biscuit cookies they give you.
Overall, at this point in the trip this is waht I've learned. I freakin' hate tourists. Doesn't matter if they're American or British or Pakistani - black, brown, red, green or white - I hate them all. Now that's not really a surprise since I generally loathe other people but when you become a tourist you immedately think that the whole universe revolves solely around you. Now that can't be true since it's scientific fact that the whole universe revolves around me - it's been proven again and again. So I know these people are wrong.
So don't listen to any of those stories about beastly Americans in Europe. Every tourist in Europe is beastly. They stop right in front of you while walking, the congregate on the sidewalk like they own it, they bump and push and have a complete disregard for the poeple or things around them. To combat this (and because it's fun), I've started "accidentally" walking into people when they stop in front of me. Now, I try to reserve this only for the worst offenders (and especially for repeat offenders). It's pretty effective.
The Dutch poeple, however, are very nice. In cafe's and bars they've been very friendly and everyone speaks English - so that hasn't been a problem.
I've also learned that my parent's brought me up right. I watch these kids in the hostels and all I want to do is give them a smack in the head. They're rather rude and uninterested in anything that doesn't involve liquor and/or drugs. I asked some of them how they liked the museums or the architecture and all I got were blank stares (since they get up at 3 PM everyday they haven't seen much). Seriously, I'm beginning to worry about the future of humankind. I want'everyone with kids to go give your kid a smack in the ass when you're done reading this - it's good for them.
Well that's it for me. I'll be travelling most of tomorrow so probably no blogging or emailing for me. I'm still working on getting the pictures uploaded.
Showing posts with label Amsterdam. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Amsterdam. Show all posts
Thursday, July 03, 2008
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Praise Jeebus
OK, so I’ve been in Amsterdam for two days now and I haven’t gotten high once. Are you proud of me momma?
I have, however, been walking for about 5 hours a day and taking a ton of pictures (over 300 easy). It’s just so freakin’ beautiful, well most of it (but more on that later). I got here around 9 AM on the bus from London.
Warning: NEVER TAKE A BUS FROM LONDON TO AMSTERDAM. Ever. For any reason. Enough said. It sort of made me wonder if taking the bus around Europe was a bad idea, but I’ve talked to some people here at the hostel who came in via Busabout and they said it was pretty nice. So I’ll reserve judgment and hold off on having someone mail me a Eurail pass.
This hostel is much better than the last. A lot cleaner with friendlier staff and more of a mix of people and ages. So when I got here Nikki picked me up at Amstel station and we headed back to her place. We caught up for a while and then headed out for a bike tour of Amsterdam. I didn’t even fall off once! Yeah me. Then because the weather was nice she took me to this hippy beach area. It was nice and weird at the same time. It was sort of like a shanty town with a make shift restaurant/bar. Everything decorated in psychedelic patterns – apparently it was very “Dutch”.
Then we headed out and met some of her friends for snacks/drinks and to watch the Euro Cup finals. Yes – I watched a sporting event (will wonders never cease). All her friends were nice enough to speak English for me which I’m sure was more of an imposition than they let on.
I’ve spent the last two days just walking around the city taking pictures. Just when you thing you’ve seen it all you turn the corner and there’s something else beautiful. It’s really amazing (and the city layout is totally confusing so I probably have 200 pictures of the same square). But I did take a canal boat tour ala Monica’s suggestion and that was helpful. But seriously, my dogs are barking and my footwear is giving me blisters. So I’ve decided to tone down the walking a little and make better use of public transport. It’s supposed to be lousy weather tomorrow, so I’m planning on doing the whole museum thing. It’s been so nice here weather-wise I wanted to make sure I did the outdoorsy stuff while I could. More later and I’ll post the pics as soon as I can.
So now on the R rated stuff (Mom, you can stop reading now). This Red Light district is completely disgusting. These girls, who are in no way attractive, sit in windows like store mannequins, and try to entice you to buy their "services". This enticement may come in the form a leg spread (ala Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct) or, to my surprise, the windows actually open (like doors) and they reach out and grab your unit.
Now I’m no prude, but getting your unit grabbed should never be a surprise (and never when your attention is somewhere else) – it ends badly. In this case in ended with me jumping backwards and tripping over the cobblestones behind me (cobblestones really have an issue with the Jacomes) and grabbing onto the hooker for balance – which just made us both fall down. So there we are on the ground while passers by laughed at us. She apologized for startling me (which I though was nice considering – even though it was totally her fault) and then tried to get me to have a go. I declined as I wouldn’t have had sex with her for free – never mind for money. The rest of the district, where there aren’t hookers, is all sex shops selling toys and porno. I just kept thinking, “Wow I know someone who would think he had died and gone to heaven to be here.” But I’ll leave him nameless so as to spare him any embarrassment – but you know who you are.
So I headed out of the red light district (I’m sharing a room with six people – what use do I have for porno) and went to sit in a square. While I was sitting there these two older women in red vests that said “Aide” come over and started talking to me – asking me where I was from and if I was liking Amsterdam. Then they asked me if I’d allowed Jesus to save me and I thought, “Jesus freaks just steps from the red light district?” Well I guess they know their audience. So, because my momma and poppa taught me to be polite, I said that I wasn't interested. But they weren’t taking no for an answer – which I guess is as it should be. You can't spread the word if you give up too easily. I mean Jesus did die on a cross – these ladies should at least be persistent. Finally they gave up when I told them that I thought Jesus was the son of the devil and that he was going to bring about the end of humanity. After that, I guess they figured I was crazier than they were and left me alone.
I have, however, been walking for about 5 hours a day and taking a ton of pictures (over 300 easy). It’s just so freakin’ beautiful, well most of it (but more on that later). I got here around 9 AM on the bus from London.
Warning: NEVER TAKE A BUS FROM LONDON TO AMSTERDAM. Ever. For any reason. Enough said. It sort of made me wonder if taking the bus around Europe was a bad idea, but I’ve talked to some people here at the hostel who came in via Busabout and they said it was pretty nice. So I’ll reserve judgment and hold off on having someone mail me a Eurail pass.
This hostel is much better than the last. A lot cleaner with friendlier staff and more of a mix of people and ages. So when I got here Nikki picked me up at Amstel station and we headed back to her place. We caught up for a while and then headed out for a bike tour of Amsterdam. I didn’t even fall off once! Yeah me. Then because the weather was nice she took me to this hippy beach area. It was nice and weird at the same time. It was sort of like a shanty town with a make shift restaurant/bar. Everything decorated in psychedelic patterns – apparently it was very “Dutch”.
Then we headed out and met some of her friends for snacks/drinks and to watch the Euro Cup finals. Yes – I watched a sporting event (will wonders never cease). All her friends were nice enough to speak English for me which I’m sure was more of an imposition than they let on.
I’ve spent the last two days just walking around the city taking pictures. Just when you thing you’ve seen it all you turn the corner and there’s something else beautiful. It’s really amazing (and the city layout is totally confusing so I probably have 200 pictures of the same square). But I did take a canal boat tour ala Monica’s suggestion and that was helpful. But seriously, my dogs are barking and my footwear is giving me blisters. So I’ve decided to tone down the walking a little and make better use of public transport. It’s supposed to be lousy weather tomorrow, so I’m planning on doing the whole museum thing. It’s been so nice here weather-wise I wanted to make sure I did the outdoorsy stuff while I could. More later and I’ll post the pics as soon as I can.
So now on the R rated stuff (Mom, you can stop reading now). This Red Light district is completely disgusting. These girls, who are in no way attractive, sit in windows like store mannequins, and try to entice you to buy their "services". This enticement may come in the form a leg spread (ala Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct) or, to my surprise, the windows actually open (like doors) and they reach out and grab your unit.
Now I’m no prude, but getting your unit grabbed should never be a surprise (and never when your attention is somewhere else) – it ends badly. In this case in ended with me jumping backwards and tripping over the cobblestones behind me (cobblestones really have an issue with the Jacomes) and grabbing onto the hooker for balance – which just made us both fall down. So there we are on the ground while passers by laughed at us. She apologized for startling me (which I though was nice considering – even though it was totally her fault) and then tried to get me to have a go. I declined as I wouldn’t have had sex with her for free – never mind for money. The rest of the district, where there aren’t hookers, is all sex shops selling toys and porno. I just kept thinking, “Wow I know someone who would think he had died and gone to heaven to be here.” But I’ll leave him nameless so as to spare him any embarrassment – but you know who you are.
So I headed out of the red light district (I’m sharing a room with six people – what use do I have for porno) and went to sit in a square. While I was sitting there these two older women in red vests that said “Aide” come over and started talking to me – asking me where I was from and if I was liking Amsterdam. Then they asked me if I’d allowed Jesus to save me and I thought, “Jesus freaks just steps from the red light district?” Well I guess they know their audience. So, because my momma and poppa taught me to be polite, I said that I wasn't interested. But they weren’t taking no for an answer – which I guess is as it should be. You can't spread the word if you give up too easily. I mean Jesus did die on a cross – these ladies should at least be persistent. Finally they gave up when I told them that I thought Jesus was the son of the devil and that he was going to bring about the end of humanity. After that, I guess they figured I was crazier than they were and left me alone.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Leavin' On a Jet Plane
Well a "coach" actually. I leave tonight from Britain and get into Amsterdam tomorrow at 9 AM. Turns out Nicole Hrycaj, who some of you might remember from High School, lives in Amsterdam now and she's crazily agreed to meet me at the station tomorrow morning and take me bike riding around Amsterdam - how cool is that? It should be a great way to see the city and not something I would have done on my own (I don't even remember the last time I was on a bike - but I haven't told Nikki that). So I'm really looking forward to it.
Other than that the last day in Britain was pretty much just a recap. Went back to Trafalgar (I know I mispelled that) Square because it was raining the other day when I went and today was bright and sunny. Went back to a couple of other places as well. Now I'm back at the hostel where I'm going to hang out until 6 then I'll collect my bag and head to Victoria Coach Station for the (hopefully) uneventful overnight trip to Amsterdam.
I've posted some of the London pics (http://www.adoramapix.com/jjtest/London/), put only a small sample (like 30 of 300). This internet access at the hostels kinda sucks but I'm trying to figure out a better solution. But the cell networks here are just as screwed up as they are back at home with roaming charges being crazy expensive. So y'all are stuck with the sporadic posts and emails, the lack of spelling and grammar checking and watered down pic uploads until I figure something out.
I have to say I'm starting to get a little homesick already which I hadn't expected. But isn't entirely surprising either. So that's it for now. I'll post more rantings and, hopefully, some pics of me NOT falling off a bike into oncoming traffic (kidding Mom - i'll be fine) tomorrow or the Monday.
Other than that the last day in Britain was pretty much just a recap. Went back to Trafalgar (I know I mispelled that) Square because it was raining the other day when I went and today was bright and sunny. Went back to a couple of other places as well. Now I'm back at the hostel where I'm going to hang out until 6 then I'll collect my bag and head to Victoria Coach Station for the (hopefully) uneventful overnight trip to Amsterdam.
I've posted some of the London pics (http://www.adoramapix.com/jjtest/London/), put only a small sample (like 30 of 300). This internet access at the hostels kinda sucks but I'm trying to figure out a better solution. But the cell networks here are just as screwed up as they are back at home with roaming charges being crazy expensive. So y'all are stuck with the sporadic posts and emails, the lack of spelling and grammar checking and watered down pic uploads until I figure something out.
I have to say I'm starting to get a little homesick already which I hadn't expected. But isn't entirely surprising either. So that's it for now. I'll post more rantings and, hopefully, some pics of me NOT falling off a bike into oncoming traffic (kidding Mom - i'll be fine) tomorrow or the Monday.
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